Yetihad News

  • Date 28/10/2025

    Location: Los dos hombres – londres

    As the night started to pitch in, food and refreshments were taken before the final push to complete the tournament in our new favourite venue.

    Line-ups:

    The Gilded Sparrows

    3 Linemen

    1 Thrower (Colin)

    2 Blitzers

    1 Ogre (Andru)

    Bits of Bob

    2 Werewolves (Wolfy and Whistler)

    3 Zombies

    1 Flesh Gollum

    1 Wraith (Bedsheet)

    First Half

    The Necros kicked off, and the kick-off event was ‘Brilliant coaching’ El G gets a re roll ( He later tries to get this upgraded to one per half but was fortunately kept in check and had it limited to just the 1!!)

    Blitzer Keef drops ball, and El G tries to move the Ogre by flying 6 spaces !!! (he will no doubt blame the beer!!)

    I go to the bar and both werewolves end up in the bin ! I will need the fans to phone in with photo evidence to document what happened, suffice to say El G was off to a good start

    And then the Flesh Gollum is dead dead two 6s twice And super dead as it fails its regeneration, El Golfo is inconsolable as he lays him to rest straight into his cardboard box and calls for extra sellotape to seal the sarcophagus.

    This death is marked down as a confirmed kill for Keef the blitzer I believe

    1-0 to the Imperials as Colin the Thrower finally crosses he line with El G dragging out the torment!!

    The Necros to receive and as if he hadn’t already had enough luck, El G get another   Kick off event in his favour , Cheering fans!! This grants the Imperials a prayer from nuffle, a Stiletto for Colin who can now stab at will !!

    The Ball bounces into the end zone so it  ends up with the werewolf (wolfy)

    El golf turn 6 of first half Blitzes werewolf gets a skull and falls over

    Second Half

    El Golfo’s turn 2  pushes the werewolf up the pitch push back imperial linemen but they have fend so no following up on a push.

    The Werewolf carrier (whistler) gets knocked down by thrower, but Andru the Ogre rolls double skulls and falls over ‘d’oh!!’

    El Golfo sensing blood goes for his very first foul using the dispensable zombie, but with no offensive assists (check those rules) it fails and Andru’s skull remains intact unlike when a goblin bruiser tried this back in the summer tournament in the mighty ham of buck!

    The tide turns quickly and with a Werewolf down v lineman,  turn 3 for El G leads his Blitzer to run for the line and with no-one to oppose him, he strolls in for 2-0, that’s a wrap as they almost call for last orders

    FInal Note

    Blitzer Keef (if it can be confirmed) has to go down as a truly intimidating foe, so much that he made the undead dead and so scared they failed to regenerate!!!

  • After some liquid refreshment, the hazy Jaipur and ginger beers were going down well, all was ready for game 2 of the tournament, RWW was unchanged and ready to roll, a bit of a grudge match against the tricky and unpredictable Necro

    Line-ups:

    Rolando and the Warpstone Whiskers

    2 gutter runners (both skilled up with block) 

    3 Clanrat linemen  (including wrestler Larry)

    1 Rat Ogre (Rolando)

    Bits of Bob

    2 Werewolves (Wolfy and Whistler)

    3 Zombies

    1 Flesh Gollum

    1 Wraith

    First Half

    The Necros kicked off, hoping to land the ball on Rolando’s head but it fell nicely between the big man and his well spaced-out line rats (no-one wanted to feel Rolando’s hanger (it was getting close to teatime!!)

    Word of caution, the cameraman was onto his 2nd pint of hazy Jaipur (you might begin to work out how aptly named this refreshing beverage was!!)

    The rats picked up the ball nicely and got into their smooth rolling machine, Rolando looking on waiting to pounce on any undead that looked at him funny!!

    Soon the rat machine had spun round the meagre Necro defence, leaving just a lone werewolf to stop the speedy pair from scoring, even Blitzer Bob managed to keep up with them.

    Wolfy went down like a sack of spuds leaving Sidestep Steve to rush in another score.

    Top scorer in the league so far , :), I may have to rename him Erling (if the Yetihad reopens for business!!)

    El Golfo was left pondering about chatting to the barmaid,
    1-0 to the mighty rats, whilst Sidestep Steve did his victory lap!!

    The Necro dusted themselves down, put back bits and bobs and thrust towards the endzone like a pack of hungry wolves,

    Suddenly the Skaven realized Rolando wouldn’t have the speed to get back and it was left to the gutters to cover the end zone (these guys get around a bit!!)

    I can only apologize for the shoddy camera work, but I’m sure there was some El G related moaning in my ear!

    Suffice to say the rats didn’t take proper precautions and the sneaky wolves snuck around the defense to level up at 1-1

    Second Half

    The second half kicked off and the camera man had a break and a kit –kat.

    Rolando got back in the action and laid out the Flesh Gollum (he wasn’t on good form at this tournament). Steve dropped the ball but El Golfo’s  luck ran out, and the rats eventually picked up the ball after dropping it 5 scoring squares from the end zone and scored in turn 5, to take a decisive 2-1 victory

    El G doing his best two Ronnies impression, and much better camera work from steady cam man Keef 2-1 finish

    Final note

    The rats prepare to pick up reliable Rolando, proof that big guys can do what they’re told and be team players for the greater cause !!

  • Date: 28-10-25
    Location: Los dos hombres – Londres

    High noon was set for the first match-up in the Tri-wizard tournament. Unfortunately, due to the late closure of the Yetihad because of a burst water main, both the Necro and Skaven had trouble travelling into the big smoke. To exacerbate matters, the ‘block gate’ saga caused an immediate vote for a confirmation of the rules for the independent mini-league. After much deliberation, finger-pointing, raised pints of hazy Jaipur, and ‘shhhhhs’, the budget rule was kept in place, and order could resume (for now!).

    Line-ups:

    • Rolando and the Warpstone Whiskers:
      • 2 gutter runners (both skilled up with block)
      • 3 Clanrat linemen (including wrestler Larry)
      • 1 Blitzer
      • 1 Rat Ogre (Rolando)
    • The Gilded Sparrows:
      • 3 Linemen
      • 2 Blitzers
      • 1 Thrower
      • 1 Ogre

    First Half Highlights

    El G had settled into his seat, a bit too well! The rats acclimatized to the new surroundings after the slightly bumpy ride in their travel tin.

    The ball had been left behind at the Yetihad, but El Golfo used his ingenuity to fashion a new one out of post-it notes (brought to collect phone numbers :).

    El Golfo looking slick in his best clobber and relishing the role of ‘ref/neutral/negotiator/ procurer of sellotape’

    The rats kicked off, and the ball landed just behind Andru the Ogre, who was blissfully unaware of this! The sparrows sped up the pitch to engage the rats and picked on the usual cannon fodder, and down went Lineman Phil.

    Just as it was all looking good for El G, the classic bonehead struck struck (just after he had debated the pros and cons of bringing the ‘ big guy’ in any team 🙂

    Despite the continued presence of Bonehead, El G recovered to sneak around ‘Not reliable’ Rolando (who would up his game for the remainder of the tournament), and Colin got on the scoreboard, making it 1-0 to the Imperials.

    The Rats regrouped and got to work by picking the ball up speedily and dashing towards the end zone, only 2 turns left was it enough for them to force the score?

    El Golfo couldn’t contain his excitement!!
    The pressure was starting to show on El G, had he calculated correctly?

    Despite Rolando ‘ Mr Reliable’ getting involved, the Rats turned up short and ran out of time 🙂  

    El C was as calm as usual

    Second Half Highlights

    El G would not budge from his ‘dug out’, so despite changing halves, the angles were very familiar for all involved. He would eventually get up for much need sustenance!

    The rolling rat machine was now oiled nicely and working well. Rolando could only watch as Steve and Bob sped towards victory, though the new regulation ball was proving tricky to keep under control. it had a very unpredictable bounce!!

    Rolando roars on his teammates, no animal savagery in sight! He was just a pleased teammate, but the blood bowl battle was taking a toll, and the sin bin was getting a bit crowded!

    Steve and Bob dashed for glory. El C got very frustrated and seemed to have nowhere to turn.

    El C gets v frustrated and seems to have no where to turn!

    El C offers to concede to a 1-0 defeat to speed up the game (slow according to El G ‘ its supposed to be complete in a lunch break’ ) El G is obviously used to such luxuries unfamiliar to the rest of the league!!

    But wait , El C is encouraged to switch the play into reverse gear and go the long way round. Could it work?

    Rolando ties up Andru and Steve downs some Lucozade sport and goes for it

    Is this panic mode El G?
    Unfortunately, not, as Steve is surfed into the crowd
    El G chalks up another victory 1-0 to the imperials

    Final Note

    To prove this is an independent and neutral journalist: Cool as a cucumber Colin – STAR PLAYER.

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